I’ve been feeling down the last few days. Pregnancy has been getting harder on my body – I’m past the point of “cute baby bump” and into the “are you sure there’s only one in there?”-swollen feet-waddle-walk phase where everyone thinks I’ll go into labor at the drop of a pin (sidebar: why do random strangers think it’s ever okay to comment on how large a pregnant woman’s belly is!?). Additionally, we still have not closed on our house which we were supposed to close on over a month ago. As a ticking time bomb, so to speak, this has been very frustrating to me and my nesting urges are misplaced in this apartment which is too small, but we may still be living in primarily when Baby Girl makes her appearance.
Yesterday was especially rough – I have been pushing myself harder at work because of the impending leave to be more productive. I’ve been working extra hours before and after trying to get ahead and be prepared for the baby whenever she shows up. And we’ve had a lot of shows and events lately that have kept me on my feet on the weekends when I could normally be resting. So yesterday, I had the day off and I had this mental list of things I wanted to do to prepare the apartment in case the baby arrives early, but I had absolutely no energy to do those things.
I did not communicate this well to my husband, who went to visit his family yesterday after work. I was particularly and inappropriately cranky with him when he got home because I couldn’t do the things I wanted to and he hadn’t been home to help me. I knew there was a lot of exhaustion and hormones behind what I was expressing, and so did he, but that doesn’t make it easier on the receiving end.
So this morning when I woke up, several of the items I had listed off to him were done. When I went to bed at 9:45 last night, he stayed up until 1 am pre-washing cloth diapers and other baby items, doing our laundry, and cleaning up our house. I woke up so refreshed and thankful for such a caring husband who understood my heart and was so willing to take the load off of me. I bragged on him all day.
A friend from college had her baby shower today about 45 minutes away from where we live, so my bestie and I spent the afternoon out there and I just walked back into my house. It was wildly therapeutic to have a little girl time away from the house with her, and in the company of a bunch of other young mommas and soon-to-be-mommas, where I didn’t feel the looming pressure of “where on earth are we going to put this kid” every time I looked around our apartment.
When I walked in the door I noticed some of the furniture boxes were missing out of the living room, so I walked up to the second bedroom which as been the hoarding/storage area for baby stuff. My sweet, kind, wonderful man spent this day off putting together baby furniture and putting together a make-do nursery to ease my heart. I don’t even have words for how much this means to me. The last 24 hours needs to replay in my memory anytime I’m feeling down. I am so hugely blessed by how well my husband loves me, what a wonderful parent he is already, and how hard he works to settle my heart. Truly, our daughter will have a very high standard for any man who would ever entertain the thought of being her husband, because she has an incredible dad.